Tag Archives: inspiration

Day 1 – #SoloRoadTrip: Tough Goodbyes, Birthday Celebration and a Manifestation Pit Stop

26 Tuesday Aug 2025

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Today marked the official beginning of my drive back to California … but emotionally, the road trip started long before Trooper rolled out of Edmonton.

Leaving my parents is always hard, but today hit differently. Those with aging parents know — the moments saying goodbye don’t get easier. My mom’s dementia means she often doesn’t quite realize when I’m leaving, which can feel like a small gift because when I say “not for a week” – the joy on her face is beyond ecstatic. ♥️ Today, just before I left, she looked me straight in the eye and said with such beautiful seriousness: “I think you should just turn that van around and move back to Canada.” 🇨🇦

Cue the smile … and the tears.

My Uncle Dennis might be onto something with his 4am exits and slow roll down the street. 🚙

I had a tremendous few weeks in Edmonton. My sister had a successful surgery and is already on the road to recovery. Watching her lean into the practice of asking for help — something no Fedeyko excels at — was a gift in itself. She even let me do dishes and laundry (!), and while I know she’s in excellent hands with her husband, a big part of me wished I had one more week just to be near. To help. To love. To make sure she really, truly rests. Be kind to yourself, Sis.

With my heart full and a little heavy, I pointed Trooper south down Highway 2 towards Calgary. It’s a straight, uneventful drive — just open skies, prairie fields, and the room to breathe. The simplicity of that stretch let my mind wander, as it always does.

🎧 Audiobook + Podcast Companion

I started Careless People by Sarah Wynn-Williams — a fascinating, eye-opening, and honestly quite disturbing listen. And everyone that has read it says the same. I had to shift gears to something lighter just after Red Deer, eventually landing on Dear Gabby. “The Universe Has My Back” is one of my fav’s! Within minutes she had me manifesting my future (always on brand, right?). The only downside of this kind of inspired listening is that I couldn’t jot down any notes or action steps. And if I don’t write something down – there is almost zero chance I’ll remember it! ✍️ So I’ll be circling back to her Show Notes to grab the juicy links and manifestation mantras that I couldn’t capture while driving. 🙏

🌙 Being welcomed by a different family

I arrived at the home of my friend and fellow CELS board member, Mirna, just in time for a family birthday dinner for her mother-in-law. It was such a warm, welcoming, joy-filled evening. It was such a privilege to be welcomed into their home, share stories and laughs (so many laughs!), and get a little glimpse into Mirna and her husband, Sepand’s, world. But let me be clear … the real celebrity of the evening was Bizu, Cash & Mina’s dog, who definitely stole the show and most of the attention. 🐾

☕ Up Next: Calgary Coffee Chat

Tomorrow morning Mirna and I will host a CELS Coffee Chat right here in Calgary — a gathering of life science founders, investors, and ecosystem partners for a chance to catch up and share more about our Valley Ready program for Canadian companies scaling into the U.S. I’m so excited for the conversations that will unfold — the chance to reconnect with old friends — and meeting founders building ground-breaking innovation.

Until then, I’m reflecting with gratitude — for family, for friendship, and for the road that always finds a way to lead me exactly where I need to be.

Day 4 – #SoloRoadTrip+1: Border Crossings, Backroads, and a Starlink Save

04 Monday Aug 2025

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We woke up this morning in the big field behind Birdsview Brewing, still feeling inspired from yesterday’s North Cascades views. Scott had a work call scheduled for the morning, so we were planning a Starbucks stop for Wi-Fi … but the universe had other plans. The call was canceled. 🙌🏼

That gave us a slow, lovely start to the day. I made Joanne’s Famous breakfast again (naturally), and we eventually hit the road northbound … headed “home”. 🏡

Of course, we did find a Starbucks along the way. Would it even be a road trip without one?

Just before hitting the border, we did a final purge of Trooper’s fridge. Out went anything questionable —because if there’s one thing we’ve learned, it’s that you don’t mess around with fresh food at the border. #PreviousEdmontonExperience.

Crossing at Abbotsford was smooth and friendly. I handed over my Canadian passport (lesson learned years ago when I got scolded for presenting my U.S. one while entering Canada), and the officer simply asked about my U.S. status. I proudly told him I have a U.S. passport too, and he said, “Great, have a nice day.” That was it. No inspection. No questions. Just a kind welcome home.

One thing I love about these crossings are the back roads leading up to them. The small towns, the farmer’s fields, the cows and barns … it all feels so grounding, like a soft welcome mat at the edge of the country.

After we crossed into B.C., we joined Highway 5, also known as the Yellowhead Highway, and needed to find a spot for Scott to take a call. He wasn’t about to risk being on video in the back of a moving van again (lesson learned from Day 1). We pulled into a perfect roadside rest area … seemingly in the middle of nowhere …… and within minutes, I had Starlink up and running with excellent Wi-Fi. The universe provides.

Scott jumped on his call. I finished and posted my Day 3 blog. There was even a roadside restaurant at the stop, so I grabbed us some lunch since we had absolutely no food left after the border purge. It all worked out perfectly.

Back on the road, I popped on Audible – I caved and starting listening to Let Them. I don’t know that I really love Mel Robbins, but I do like the content and intention she has for making us move through life in a better, healthier way. In all honesty and being completely vulnerable here, Scott sometimes prefers to focus on his work and listen to his music over my rambling or future casting … and I’m learning to honor that (plus get something out of my solo time too!). Win-win. 😅

As we approached dusk, we were gifted the most beautiful pink and purple sky! We pulled Trooper and snapped some photos. Now THAT was worth waiting for!

A few other fun signs we saw along the way that made me smile, and proud to be a Canadian farmer’s daughter …

Just before 10pm we rolled into an RV site … Trooper’s (and ours!) very first campground stay. All our previous nights had been Harvest Hosts stops at breweries, orchards, and farm fields. But tonight, Trooper is plugged in like a proper van and we’ve got a few neighbors around.

More tomorrow… for now, we’re just soaking up this stillness, settling into Canada, and figuring out how to slow down a little so we’re ready to spend time with the ‘rents. Who, btw, celebrated their 58th wedding anniversary today! I can’t wait to give my parents a long, big hug! We recorded an anniversary video and picked up the winning lotto ticket for my parents. 💰💰 What will we do with all the lotto winnings?!

🗺️ Day 4 at a glance

  • 2 extra hours given to us (who doesn’t secretly love when work calls get cancelled!)
  • 1 final fridge purge pre-border
  • 1 Starbucks, obviously
  • 1 proud dual passport moment 🇨🇦🇺🇸
  • 1 Starlink hero moment
  • 1 order of french fries AND gravy (one of my favorite food groups 🙂
  • 1 audible, 1 working passenger
  • 1 first-time RV park experience for Trooper

— Joanne (and Scott)

Day 3 – #SoloRoadTrip+1: Aqua Lakes, Last Day in the U.S., Border Contraband

03 Sunday Aug 2025

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Today was all about the North Cascades National Park, nestled up in northern Washington. We had hopes of getting up early and out the door, but let’s be real … we are on vacation and “all the things” take WAY more time than we expect. ⏰

We made a delicious breakfast (the Joanne Famous) 🍳 and took a few moments to soak in the peaceful orchard we had stayed at overnight. As part of the Harvest Hosts agreement, we stopped at the farm stand on our way out and picked up some cherries, tomatoes, and pickled green beans. But then we remembered we can’t take fresh produce across the Canadian border!! 😩 And our fridge? Still full. So, we spent the day looking up what is allowed and snacking on everything we could, doing our best to minimize border contraband. 😅

Then came the real adventure. ⛰️ We entered the North Cascades, winding our way through the mountain range, and our first stop was Washington Pass Overlook. And it was an expansive overlook with a long way down!!

Once my stomach made it back to where it belongs, we arrived at the Blue Lake Trail – a nearly 5-mile round-trip hike, which was beyond perfect. The trail was a dirt, single track trail, with a steady climb that resulted in 850ft of elevation gain and a beautiful reward at the top. Blue Lake was serene and quiet and the previous glacier still had snow nestled in several spots. We had a little snack up top, snapped some photos, and took in the views before heading back down. What goes up, thankfully, must come down!

What Scott and I always love about National Parks is the diversity of people you see out on the trails … grandparents, toddlers, families, couples, solo hikers, packs of girlfriends, groups of guys. It’s like a little outdoor community parade, and we both love seeing people from all parts of the world enjoying nature.

After the hike, we continued west across the park along Highway 20, stopping at one of the most breathtaking overlooks of the trip – Diablo Lake Vista Point. It was insanely windy, but the views … OMG – drop dead gorgeous. The turquoise water made us stop in our tracks. Scott wandered right up to the edge (as usual) while I stayed a healthy distance from the guardrails, my legs definitely get a little wobbly with that kind of height.

Farther along we took in the views of the Gorge Dam before hitting the small town of Newhalem and taking in a small hike at the Trail of the Cedars. Complete with a suspension bridge and tucked near a hydroelectric power plant, this small town had an early-1900s industrial-meets-wilderness vibe.

By early evening, we arrived at our next Harvest Hosts spot, a brewery right off Highway 20. We were a little too late to hit the taproom, but we parked in a big open field with plenty of space and fresh air. The sky was overcast, which made for great hiking weather earlier but didn’t offer much of a sunset. Still, it was peaceful and calm, and the perfect way to end a full day.

Todays’s highlights:

  • The hike to Blue Lake … peaceful, quiet, and absolutely stunning!
  • The aqua waters throughout the park nestled between towering peaks!
  • The family that asked Scott to take a picture at Diablo Lake Vista … and then another one … and then a family video!! I don’t know how he finagled his way out of a full blown producer role, but we ran into them again at the suspension bridge. The man practically accosted Scott … as Scott acted like he didn’t know the man. 🤣
  • That feeling of winding through majestic mountain terrain and Trooper’s first official National Park outing!

Trooper did great! The roads were twisty – had a few big drop offs and long stretches with high winds, so I definitely had some stomach-dropping moments … but Trooper handled it like a champ.

🗺️ Day 3 at a glance

  • 1 farm stand stop, with at the silver lining being the ice cream purchase that is allowed to cross into 🇨🇦
  • 1 final fridge cleanout mission – definitely a lesson learned
  • Many great conversation topics on our 5-mile hike to Blue Lake (much to Scott’s chagrin … yes I love to talk on hikes while Scott loves to “just enjoy the moment” LOL)
  • Several stunning National Park overlooks
  • 1 suspension bridge as our final goodbye to the North Cascade Mountains!
  • 1 closed brewery … but 1 quiet night with the beer we brought along 🍻
  • 1 nervous stomach (the downside of the beautiful vistas)
  • 1 peaceful, proud Trooper moment and first National Park visit complete!

Tomorrow is a big day — crossing into Canada 🇨🇦, just in time for a holiday. It’s “August Long Weekend”, which in Alberta is often referred to as Heritage Day. There’s a big annual festival in Edmonton this weekend to celebrate it so I hope my family and friends are enjoying the extra break from work. Except Quebec … funny enough, it’s not a holiday in Quebec. They celebrate some french guy later in August 🤣 so they still get a day off this month. Saint-Jean-Baptiste Day celebrates the feast day of Saint John the Baptist, a Jewish preacher and prophet. [In case anyone was curious.] 😊

And that’s a wrap of Day 3, SRT+1, 2025!

— Joanne (and Scott)

Day 2 – #SoloRoadTrip+1: Morning Routine, Stunning Views & River Crossings

02 Saturday Aug 2025

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We did not wake up at 5am today… and it was glorious!
We woke with the sun, rolled over, and went right back to sleep. 💤💤

When we finally did rise, Scott got out the camp coffee gear and did a proper pour-over for both of us. I sat nearby, journaling in the morning light. That practice – my morning journaling – has been with me for years, on and off, but it really re-rooted itself back in 2018 after a weekend at 1440 Multiversity with my best friend, Linda. We attended a session with Julia Cameron, the author of The Artist’s Way, a book I had first read 25 years ago. She’s big on morning pages … just writing, stream-of-consciousness, for 30 minutes. Linda has done it every single day since. Rain or shine, hungover or while traveling. Me? I’ve been less consistent, but for the past few weeks, as part of my 5am routine reset, I’ve been back at it! ✍️

I asked Scott for his grace on this trip so I could keep up that morning habit. While I journaled, he did his morning routine – meditation, stretches, and a lot of coffee while catching up on the news. He looked like some yoga warrior glowing in the morning sun, right there in the parking lot of a brewery. 🧘

And then … “fill ‘er up!”. Thank goodness for Costco and $3.22 a gallon. We also grabbed a Starbucks before heading out of Bend, we’ll both admit it … the Starbucks was better than Scott’s brew this time. Sorry babe, but I appreciate the effort.

Once we were caffeinated and rolling, we tapped ChatGPT… aka Chatty … for help choosing a few spots along the way. And Chatty did not disappoint. One of the gems was Smith Rock State Park and it was the best! If you haven’t been – add it to your list! 🧗

Sheer cliffs, deep canyons, winding river, epic trails. We found a switchback trail that took us up the mountainside … and yes, I was a little nervous with the drop-offs, but I did it. 💪. We came across a river crossing that only opens when the water is low enough. It’s mostly for horses but … we crossed it on foot. It wasn’t deep … maybe mid-calf … but it was cool and refreshing and one of those small, magical moments. You’ll see photos below. Scott isn’t a very good rule follower so that alone made Scott’s day.

After the hike, we returned to Trooper and made lunch. We’re starting a little ritual … back doors open, lunch in the van, view out. Today’s view was that incredible rock face. Not bad for a mid-day picnic.

Then it was back on the road. 🚐 🎶

We made our way toward Yakima and stopped at a winery … but not just a winery. This place had it all: wine, whiskey, pie, tomatoes. We picked up a gorgeous tomato salad to go with our dinner, then made our way to our Harvest Hosts stop for the night — an orchard, all to ourselves. It was peaceful, charming, and just perfect.

Scott barbecued dinner under the stars while I cooked the veggies on the induction stovetop. We got our Starlink working within minutes (that will be a great #vaninvestment) and wherever the saying came from … we were “Cooking with Crisco!”

We received a great pic of Ms. Torrie from our housesiters. Come one. She’s adorable!! We miss her. If we were home, we’d have been up at 5am feeding her, walking her. But we know she’s in great hands with our house sitters. She’s probably curled up in one of her favorite spots, living her best life.

Tomorrow’s a big day.
We’re heading to North Cascades National Park. Scott is pumped. He loves National Parks. Before me (BJ, Before Joanne, haha) Scott was already on a mission to visit them all. Now it’s become our shared goal. We do at least one a year. We collect those ceramic coasters from each park and Scott guards his annual pass like it’s made of gold.

🗺️ Day 2 at a glance

  • 1 Starbucks stop
  • 1 Washington lotto stop
  • 1 epic hike
  • 1 water crossing
  • Trooper’s first State Park visit
  • Another lesson with our trusted toilet
  • 300 miles on the absolutely stunning Hwy 97!!!
  • Crossing the 45th Parallel (and we’ll be at the 59th Parallel mid month!)
  • Our inaugural lunch in Trooper
  • 1 missed highway exit (that turned into a silver lining with a much-needed gas stop… no Costco in this neck of the woods and the cost of gas sky rocketed!)

Stay tuned for tomorrow’s adventure…

— Joanne (and Scott)

Day 0 – #SoloRoadTrip+1: Christmas in July

31 Thursday Jul 2025

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It’s the night before we hit the road, and I’m equal parts buzzing with excitement and absolutely wiped out from all the prep. This is my fifth annual road trip to Canada, well, almost. I skipped one year (thanks, COVID 2020), but otherwise I’ve done this every summer since 2019.

This trip is extra special. Scott is joining me for the outbound journey, which officially makes this year’s adventure #SoloRoadTrip+1. Trooper, our new beloved camper van, is packed to the brim with gadgets, gear, and enough collapsible storage to make even Marie Kondo weep with joy.

Let’s talk Amazon for a second. If you search “RV essentials” or “#vanlife” say goodbye to your money and hello to a flood of packages. For weeks, our front door has looked like a fulfillment center. It’s been straight-up Christmas in July. 🎁📦

Here’s a taste of what we’ve added to Trooper:

  • Induction stove pans with clip-on handles (game changer for storage)
  • Sustainably friendly dishware and Tupperware that actually fit in our teeny drawers
  • Yeti mugs for ☕️ … tumblers for 🍷and 🥃
  • Collapsible containers, baskets, and bins (Yes, I am a space-saving queen!)
  • A sizable fridge filled with food and drinks for nights when we want to cook vs. hit up a brewery or winery via Harvest Hosts

Today was one of those final-prep days, but with a few lovely surprises. Scott and I met up with one of his high school friends and his family who were in town. We had a quick drink with them at Kincaid’s before he had to head into the city for a work event. After that, I zipped home and finished packing … while watching season six of #Younger. Whitney and Jennifer (not Jen) – you are right. I don’t want it to end!

But now Trooper is loaded! The snacks are prepped. Gas tank is full! My podcast and audible list is all queued up. And the feeling? That beautiful blend of anticipation, nostalgia, and adventure.

This year’s Canada leg is packed with heart:

  • My parents’ anniversary is next week 💕
  • My sister’s birthday is around the corner 🎉
  • The annual WeMeet Fedeyko Family Reunion is happening 🍻
  • And a very, very special side trip is coming: a journey up to High Level — the farm I grew up on. My dad (who homesteaded and cleared that land back in the ’60s and farmed it for almost 35 years) will be riding in Trooper with me, Scott, and my uncle Dennis. I may not remember much from childhood, but my dad remembers everything. And I can’t wait to walk that land with him and celebrate Scott and mines 4th year anniversary from SW 2 110 17 W5.

So with everything checked off the list, tonight is about one final sleep. Tomorrow, we roll.

Canada, here we come. 🚐 🇨🇦

Day 1 #SoloRoadTrip – California Coast

25 Thursday Jul 2024

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#WindshieldTime. It never disappoints.

I started the day with a workout. Vowing “this time” be more active, not only when I am in Edmonton for a few weeks, but also while on the road. I’m saying it out loud here so that my accountability partners keep me honest. 💪

After that I said goodbyes to two loves in my life. I was able to get Torrie in for a quick photo before I took off. She’s very camera shy. 🐾

For those that live in San Francisco or know its weather patterns, these 3 images of the Golden Gate Bridge depict our infamous “micro climates”. The images were taken at the beginning, middle and end of the bridge. All in 1.7 miles (2.7 Km). Wow! And don’t worry, Mom & Dad and Scott, I was going very slow and being very safe when I snapped those photos. 😎 📷

I started listening to my friend Jane’s new book, coming out in September. I’m hono(u)red to be part of her “Launch Squad” and to receive an advance copy of the book (and audiobook). I’ve known Jane for over a decade and we’ve had 100’s of o’dark hundred morning runs together. Over the years she’s opened up about being a sibling sexual abuse (SSA) survivor and all of us in the running gang have been on the journey with her as she’s become an advocate for SSA. I encourage everyone to watch her TEDx talk, which I and a few other close friends of Jane, was privileged enough to attend and support her reaching that major milestone. And I see you’re at 650K views, Jane – wow – amazing!

“I Feel Real Guilty” is Jane’s memoir and I encourage everyone to follow Jane and share her story with family, friends and colleagues, because SSA is something that is not talked about or understood. Thank you for being so brave, Jane, and for writing with such vulnerability. I’m blown away by your journey.

Meanwhile, it was hard to pay attention to the road when the California coastline is so absolutely stunning. I did this route back in 2019 for my inaugural #SoloRoadTrip and the beauty doesn’t get old.

Along the way, not only did the forest and coastline tempt me to stop for photos, so did the wineries and the rustic little shops! #Wine and #MeatShop. Next time I have to plan more time in my trip for much longer random stops! 🍕 🍷

And then I was reminded that some things are not as they seem.

This looked like a cool old hotel but when I took the turn off the highway to take a snap, well, it looks like the Thatcher Hotel has seen better days!

The temperatures were high today! Mostly between 32C (89F) and 39C (102F). But I kept well hydrated. A few Gatorade Zeros. Okay, plus two Starbucks Chai Lattes #myfav! and copious amounts of water. So yeah, frequent stops were in order. I balanced some healthy eating 🍏 (an apple a day keeps the doctor away!) with a little candy (Cheetos Flaming Hot is my fav! The ones that make your fingers turn orange. Yum!)

Grateful to have the chance to take this time off and appreciate my team for having my back and holding down the fort. Thank you Kennedy, Lydia and Funmbi! You guys rock!

I drove into my destination with the sun setting along the water. A little cooler at the coast but a welcome relief after a hot day.

And now … my evening gratitudes followed by The Thursday Murder Club. While not all folks in my book club liked it, or even finished it, I loved it (after the first few chapters) and am into book #3. So I highly recommend! And it’s coming to the big screen so Thida, you’re on for a Watch Party!

#SoloRoadTrip – Day 2

17 Saturday Jul 2021

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Some might say the 80 East from Nevada to Utah is a little boring, but I beg to differ. Especially when it’s your first time driving it.

7.5 hours of drive time but the mountain ranges on both sides gave me a pretty sight to look at the entire way …. and the long, straight highway kept my focus on my future. I loved it!

It’s a huge treat to stay at a friend’s place while I am in Utah! It’s just a bummer that I missed them by 7.5 hours. 🙂

P.S. It almost took me as long from the gate to the house, Beth, as it did from Reno to Park City! LOL But the view is definitely worth it. With huge gratitude!!

And now for the best part ….

Live country music!!!

I swear it felt like heaven to be sitting at a bar and hearing such a sweet, heartfelt, familiar sound.

Beth, please thank Meg for this awesome recommendation!

And now I’m holding myself accountable to a promise I made … which is to get out of my comfort zone when it comes to videos. I have to post at least one per day. This one makes the cut, for obvious reasons. 😍😍

Final thoughts …

Back when I started “blogging” (and I use that verb loosely 😆) … I used to love coming home after an event and with a glass of wine, or whiskey, write a blog post. It would be about something that had caught my attention that day, or something that was percolating in my mind. I’ve craved getting back to writing in some shape or form … so I’m glad this road trip is getting me back in the habit. Of writing. I’ve been keeping up with the wine and whiskey drinking, of course. 😆

#SoloRoadTrip – Day 1

16 Friday Jul 2021

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And the journey begins!

And YAY – I can now upload videos! #Sweet!!

As you’ll hear from the video and see from the picture, my journey has started out in the best way possible … a run with friends!

I have been running with this crew consistently for the last five years and they are my lifeline! Our 0545 (turned 0630) morning runs on M/W/F each week have kept me sane and something I look forward to. Our #NeverMissAMonday has gotten me out of bed in the pitch dark of winter and the bright light of summer. Grateful to my friends for joining me this morning before I set off! Thanks Jane, Debbie, Derek and Don! With special mention to their furry friends Leo, Cota and Emmie!

Friday afternoon traffic on the 80 East probably wasn’t the best idea, but once I was out of the city I started to relax and just let the road lead me where I was about to go.

I started the trip off with a few founders — it is always so much fun to connect with ambitious people looking to change the world! And then I got re-acquainted with Sirius Radio — it was one of the things I cut off when Covid hit because I wasn’t driving anywhere! I got in one podcast Lewis Howes – The Millionaire Habits That Changed My Life – Episode 1135. I’ll add some of the highlights from here tomorrow!

And as I pulled into my first destination, I turned on some music that I love … these likely aren’t on your play list but they are on mine 🙂

  • Eric Church – Mr. Misunderstood (I got to see him in concert a few years back – was the best 2nd date that never went anywhere, that I’ve ever had 🙂
  • Rachel Platten – Fight Song (oh how many times I sing this one out loud!)
  • LOCASH – I Love this Life!! (If this doesn’t make you get up and want to dance, well then, you probably don’t like country music 🙂
  • Ashley McBryde – Girl Goin’ Nowhere (Damn, I want to find out where I can see her live – she’s so real and awesome – love her music .. And this song … I’m sorry, but ladies, .. c’mon .. who doesn’t relate to this??!?)
  • Luis Fonsi & Daddy Yankee – Despacito (GreeceBaby is calling us again Mona, Karen and Mahlet!)
  • Dean Brody – Time (Everyone go and kiss and hug your loved ones, please)
  • John Mayer – In the Blood (Always think of my friend Bruce when this song comes on)

Looking for Audible recommendations; Podcasts, and yes, I’d love to hear what music makes you want to get up and dance!

Grateful for …. my parents and sister for being my co-pilots and check in points along my journey | my team for keeping the train running smoothly while I am away | 30 degree sunshine! | my car! I love driving it and she’s keeping me safe on my travels | friends letting me couch surf and break up my travels.

Not many places to stop and take photos of the breathtaking views as you’re heading towards Tahoe, but just like my Dad says about lotto tickets … all you need is one.

Until tomorrow!

The Footsteps of Superwoman

09 Saturday Aug 2014

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When I came up with the title of this blog it was because at the time, I was playing the role of step-mom to a beautiful 10 year old girl, and it was the first time in my life that I got to experience being a parent. I quickly discovered a huge appreciation for every parent on the planet and especially those that were doing it alone. I was amazed how important it became for me to drop my work and ensure this girl learned her multiplication, completed her homework, adapted to the nuances of living here, and at the same time, met some new friends and started to experience all the beauty that surrounded us. While it wasn’t easy, because I’m pretty good at being a workaholic, there wasn’t ever any contest — without asking, the girl and her needs always won over (and happily so).

I kept the name of the blog even though by the time I starting writing, my circumstances had changed and (sadly for some reasons, and happily for others) I was faced with simply taking care of me again. With a little time I have learned that there is also something heroic about waking up and trying to figure out what I want. Did you know that it’s actually easier to wake up when you know the routine so perfectly, when you don’t have time to think? Simply wake the girl, prepare the lunch, make sure the girl gets up, do the first email check-in, ensure the homework’s packed, remind the girl we’re late, drive to school, be the friendly parent and say hello to the other busy moms and dads, hurry home, begin the day. With the absence of that purpose, it’s been WAY harder each morning — because now the purpose is me — and it has been a very long while since anyone took care of that girl.

“They say” the leading cause of divorce these days is marriage. Although I don’t know why, I do believe the statistic. 🙂 Something just seems to change when marriage is involved. Kids can play a big role, but even without children, many men and women loose themselves and struggle desperately to find their way back.

And then once we do separate and think, oh thank God I’m free from “that!”, we struggle to know who we are and what we want — and we spend oodles amounts of time and energy pushing away anything that looks remotely close to what we had in our past.

Right now I want to have it all. I want to be all of my many personalities and be all the ways that my heart tells me to be when I’m quiet enough to listen to it. I don’t want a box – certainly not the one that I’ve had before … but I do want some of the pieces that were in the box. Is it possible?  Of course it is … but it takes courage and relentless forward motion. Let’s hope I have both.

Because today I saw that little girl that inspired me to name this blog (amongst many other things that I’m sure will be the subject of future writings), and for those few hours, I was reminded what a real superwoman looks like. And that piece exists within me — that I know for sure, and it brings me joy when I think about it and her.  And I don’t want it to go away.

Tomorrow I get to be runner girl and wake up at 5:30 am to share a beautiful and challenging trail with some women I’m lucky to call my friends. I’ve desperately missed that, and them, and I always want to have this as my number one choice for a Saturday morning.

And then tomorrow night I’ll be just a girl out on the town with my best friend. I’ll wash the hours of sweat from my face and dirt from my toes and wear high heels or boots (cause it is San Francisco in the summer after all) and no one will know by looking at me the other sides that exist or that I started my day in a pair of trail shoes.

And the best part will be Sunday, when I get to be explorer girl and do something new with someone I am excited to get to know. Even though he’s only ready to see a few sides of me — that’s okay. We are all on our own path and the only thing important is to enjoy the path that we are on in that one moment.

Why can’t we be all of THAT in a marriage?

And if I thought I was on the wrong track, then the text from Alaska out of the blue as I started to write this blog, reminded me that I am not.

“and btw: your inner superwoman is right in front of you — there are a few occasions where she’s following YOUR footsteps”.

Wow. How can I not celebrate all of those pieces that make up the reason why I started this blog in the first place.

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Helping with the school book report … Priceless.

Caution: Work in Progress

30 Friday May 2014

Posted by in Life's Lessons

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So the past few weeks have been filled with immense joy — and at the same time a bit of a heavy heart. Two opposite sides of the spectrum, for two different aspects of my life. Maybe this is what “they” say when they talk about “balance”. Actually I hope it isn’t.

But the two opposite feelings remind me that we are all a Work in Progress. And that life is a series of steps that we have to take in order to reach our destination. Some people have to take more steps than others. Sometimes the steps are steeper and harder for some to climb. And sometimes … one just gets lucky and an elevator appears! Like the employees of WhatsApp – for them, a magic carpet appeared and they now get to miss a few steps that others of us have to take. But good for them! I believe that the world is a better place when more people find happiness within their lives!

work-in-progress

Regardless of the journey, we are struggling through the Work in Progress construction zone. Be it professionally, personally, in a job, a marriage, a friendship, or with the inner self. We should not feel guilty for the path we’ve taken – or the way in which we’ve climbed the mountain. Some of us are more graceful than others. Some are sort of on the clumsy side. And the rate in which we progress is really anybody’s guess. What makes a lesson stick so deeply that we modify the path? What happens when we choose a different attitude along the way? What works for one, isn’t the same recipe for others. So we’re left with good ole ‘trial and error’ … and perhaps a few more “I’m sorry” or “I am learning” mentions along the way.

But when things are not going perfectly in one aspect of our lives, we’ve got to remember that we have others to balance it out. Whether we rely on a friend, family member, job or a passion, we would do ourselves a favor if we ditch the guilt and just get on with the progress part.

Because at some point you’ll reach a certain destination and you’ll look back at the journey and realize that each and every step contributed in some way. You can smile at the moments that made you proud, and simply shrug your shoulders for the lackluster performances.

So enjoy each step. The easy ones – the hard ones – the steep ones – and the less than graceful ones. And never give up on that which you most desire.

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