when i’m rich and famous

29 Saturday Mar 2014

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accomplished, famous, generous, giving, goals, happiness, happy, kindness, nice, rich

Something happened to me recently that made me decide that when I am rich and famous I am going to be nice to everyone. And I mean every.one.!! And then I gave it some more thought and decided that I shouldn’t wait until I’m rich and famous to be nice to everyone (because let’s be honest, that might not happen) – Instead I’m going to make it something that I do everyday, starting now. So alas … another resolution to add to my year of “living the length AND width of life”!

Where did this idea come from and why am I blogging about it??

Recently I went to an event and there were some famous, wealthy and very accomplished people there. Some were nice, and some quite frankly were not nice at all. And I really don’t like to feel that I don’t have the right job title, or that I’m wearing the right brand, to warrant a little polite or professional courtesy. But what struck me the most was that at the end of the night, someone that I didn’t think would engage in a conversation with me – totally did and made me feel whole again! She was incredibly generous with her time and the way she included me into the crowd made me feel really welcome. And you know, it just made all the difference.

It’s not like I’m not a nice person. (English majors please don’t critique me on that sentence!) I happen to think that I’m pretty nice and along the years I’ve had many people tell me that I’ve made them feel comfortable and welcome and things like that … but I think that taking on “being nice to everyone” will inspire a major shift in my universe and the people around me because it’s going to be something I do everyday, and not just when I’m feeling in a good mood myself. Because here is the reality – when you smile at someone – even if you don’t feel all that happy inside — you can’t help but feel a little happier. Smiling just does that to people!

Try this experiment … the next time you’re walking on a sidewalk or in a mall – make eye contact with the people walking towards you and smile, and then say “hello” … or “good morning”. You’ll be surprised at how good it makes you feel AND in the meantime – you’re making them feel good as well. You could even make a game of it and see how many people reply back (I do this on my runs ALL THE TIME).

I had a dear friend, George, who was about 78 years old when I met him, and George was a very giving person. I’ll talk about him throughout my blog posts but one thing he used to always do was say hello to people that we passed on the street. George would actually add “how are you today” … or “nice to see you” … and for the first few times I thought that George just happened to know these people because the greeting was so friendly! But it turned out that he didn’t – he was just being friendly! And it even made ME feel good because I was walking with him and that heartfelt “hello” made me smile as well.

So I decided that because this woman made me feel so amazing – that I’m going to strive to make others feel that way all the time – whomever it is that I come in contact with … because you never know when you might be able to make someone’s day.

Consider the idea yourself … you never know who you might bring happiness to (and who, in turn, will one day write a blog post about it). <smile>

I look forward to fulfilling on this new promise …

Life (unedited)

19 Wednesday Mar 2014

Posted by Joanne Fedeyko in Inspiration, Love

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comfortable in your own skin, life lessons, mistakes, Oprah

Over the years I’ve made a few (okay, probably truth be told, a lot) of mistakes and I’ve always wondered – do other people make as many mistakes? … as disappointing of mistakes? … do the mistakes keep them up at night and feeling bad? … and who really says “it’s okay – live and learn and move on” and mean it?

Well I think the honest answer is that everyone makes mistakes, right? But the way we process and manage through those mistakes is very different for everyone. And just like with other things in life, some of us are better at accepting mistakes than others. Wasn’t it Oprah that finally felt truly beautiful at 50 and comfortable in her own skin? I’m paraphrasing here but I remember watching her around that time and thinking, My God, do I have to wait that long!!

Although I’m still a few years away from that milestone, it will come quickly I’m sure. So I figure best to learn from those before me that life, while wonderful, is no where near the perfect picture that somehow got etched in our minds. Therefore I’m going to make a pledge to let my life, for the remainder that I have (and God willing it’s awhile), shall be enjoyed to the fullest … and left unedited … Which means I may make mistakes from time to time. Actually, I WILL make mistakes … and time to time might be a little underrepresented but we’ll go with “from time to time” for the sake of argument. Who knows … what I view as a colossal failure may very well be like a rainbow on a rainy day for others, so why fuss with all the worrying?

Of course, I’ll still be mindful of life’s challenges and do my best to make my parents proud, but I think we spend too much time on the past and not enough on the present. And it’s fine time that I put these words into action … SO … I hereby pledge to live all of the moments of my life ahead … fully unedited … for the length, and the width of it.

Favorite Traditions

18 Tuesday Mar 2014

Posted by Joanne Fedeyko in Family, Inspiration

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family, holidays, love, st. patrick's day, traditions

Happy St. Patrick’s Day!

I admit, it’s not exactly the kind of day that encourages a long list of traditions (other than maybe wearing green and drinking beer – which are of course, great traditions), but it reminded me how fun having traditions are and I wanted to inspire my readers to share their favorites or start their own.

I myself do not have a lot of traditions but it’s been on my New Year’s Resolution list for some time. Sort of nerdy I know but “Start New Traditions” is, IMO, a very good resolution. Why? Because the tradition doesn’t have to be big – it can be ambiguous so I can make it whatever I want – and it lives on year after year. So it’s like the gift that keeps on giving!

A dear friend of mine has LOADS of traditions … events with grade school friends, college friends, law school buddies, people he met when he lived abroad, or clubs he’s associated with now. It seems like every time we have lunch I learn about yet another tradition or hear great stories about the ones that keep going (reminds me of the famous Ever Ready Bunny – his traditions keep going … and going).

Side note – cute image huh?! 🙂 Amazing what you can find on Google!

So be it a new tradition to go along with a holiday, a birthday, a milestone, or the ones I love the most … for no reason at all … I encourage you to think about adding a new tradition to your life. It could be “Friday Night Pizza and Laundry” … just make sure it makes you smile inside and feel good about keeping the tradition going.

As for the new tradition I said I would start back on February 14th …. I’m reminding you to give yourself (and others) some love. Because none of us know how long we will be here, and when we see news stories such as the Malaysia Flight 370 … we should all take a moment to kiss our parents, hug our children and find quiet moments to love ourselves.

My thoughts go out to the families of those on Flight 370. May we learn the truth very soon about what happened to the 239 passengers and crew on the flight.

Productivity (and Procrastination)

12 Wednesday Mar 2014

Posted by Joanne Fedeyko in Organization

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emails, fivrr.con, inbox, junk emails, netted.net, organization, priority management, procrastination, productivity, taskrabbit.com, to-do lists, unsubscribe

This topic is full of metaphors because I haven’t posted for almost a month and I can either blame it on being productive or pure procrastination.

Either way I’ll take a vowel for $100 and move on to the point.

In today’s world, everyone is busy. And I mean everyone. Well, practically everyone. My retired parents are not busy, but they should be! I believe that laziness begets laziness and sometimes there is a very fine line between being busy and being productive … and procrastination can have a lot to do with both.

Here are a few resources and suggestions to help out those that are so are far behind, they think they are ahead:

TaskRabbit.com – A great resource to find someone to help you with anything from virtual advice on how to start a Blog – which sites are better than others or perhaps troubleshoot why your photos are not loading probably … to picking up your dry-cleaning … to installing an Ikea unit that would otherwise take you a full day (and perhaps the whole bottle of wine). I’ve been using TaskRabbit for a few years now and they’ve helped me out of many binds, especially when I’ve had deadlines.

Fivrr.com – the world’s largest marketplace for services, and all for $5. I haven’t tried it myself but friends of mine have and well, it’s $5 for anything you need that they can help you with, so … why not?!

Netted.net – the unmissable daily email introducing you to the best sites, apps, and connected products that make life better. Yes it’s one more email, which I am not a fan of these days, but it’s one that is a quick read and if it’s something useful, it will save you time and bring you joy in the long run. Win-win, right?!

Unsubscribe Daily – this isn’t a website but my suggestion to keep your inbox down to a manageable size, full of things that are either important to you or enhance your life. Every day for the next month analyze your daily inbox and click “Unsubscribe” to all of the emails that are either junk, not useful, a pain in the butt or simply not relevant to your life right now. You can always add them back later guys, if you really miss them. But chances are you won’t and you’ll gain double digit minutes, if not longer, each and every day because you won’t spend time reading any portion of them, or worse, have to wade through and delete them before finding the real gems in your inbox.

Do Three Things – Whenever you feel procrastination poking its unnecessary head into your life, make a list of three things that you absolutely need to get done and then … you guessed it … do those three things. By the time you’ve reached item #3 you’ll be on a roll and procrastination will be warded off for another day. Trust me .. this really works. Note of caution – don’t write down “Save the planet” or “Write my first novel” as your three things … pick achievable goals. “Paint the house” can certainly be number five or six on the list.

And with that … I’m off to have a productive day! … I shall not procrastinate it a moment longer!

Oh … and if you have suggestions on great resources for making your day more productive please share them by leaving a comment.

Love Yourself (more)

14 Friday Feb 2014

Posted by Joanne Fedeyko in Health & Exercise, Inspiration, Love

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bubble baths, chocolate, Diane Ackerman, february 14, football, friends, House of Cards, love, love yourself, massage, relax, self love, smartphone, valentine, valentine's day, watch my kids play, wine

Today is Valentine’s Day so it’s easy for us to remember our loved ones and to think about things that make us feel good – chocolate and massages and sweet notes to our Valentines, maybe a glass of wine with our friends. But what if we took what today is all about and applied it to our lives on a regular basis?

I once heard someone say that we take our car into the mechanic when the light reminds us to change the oil, or when our tires are flat, yet we ignore almost every warning sign that our body gives us when we need to relax or take better care of ourselves. Why is that? Are we so out of touch with the aches and pains, or the feeling that we get when we do treat ourselves with love, that we don’t recognize the signs even when they are pretty obvious?

Let’s not wait until we get sick or feel miserable to treat ourselves with love! Let’s actually apply February 14th – the day of love – to EVERY month of the year. Does that sound like something you’d like? I know I would!

So moving forward, on the 14th of every month, I will add a reminder to my blog post to treat yourself to some love, or better yet maybe I’ll dedicate the entire post to it! And we can do the journey together for a lifetime full of more love and less warning signs.

It can be whatever you want it to be. A long soak with bubbles and candles …. an uninterrupted game of Football on a Saturday afternoon … permission to sleep in …. or stay up late! …. a longer lunch with a friend … or just sitting and watching your child play with your smartphone far – far away. I have been practicing a little more self love these days and it is really wonderful! Today I had a nice workout … helped a friend with his business … treated myself to a massage … and watched House of Cards while I ate a late lunch (with two pieces of chocolate as my dessert). Life is too short to just live the length of it — I want to live the width of it as well.

So I would like you to consider more self love. Whatever that looks like for you – give it more of a try these days. Or at least, come on, once a month!

Synchronicity

12 Wednesday Feb 2014

Posted by Joanne Fedeyko in Inspiration

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belief, believe, Certified Management Accountant, clairvoyant, Entrance Exam, gut feeling, intuitition, law of attraction, psychic, psychic reading, synchronicity, woman's intuition

I went to my first psychic reading in my early 20’s. I had written my Entrance Exam for my CMA designation (Certified Management Accountant) and I just couldn’t wait the three months to get the results! I was dying to know whether I passed or not!

To give a bit of background on the CMA Entrance Exam … at the time that I wrote it (apparently) you had two chances in your life to write it, and you had to get 60% or greater to pass. I was terrified!! It was a two-day exam and I studied MONTHS for it … I did not want to have to write it again!

Since that experience I have continued to meet (or more so now a days – have a phone or Skype call) with psychics and clairvoyants and have always had really great experiences. Tonight I was introduced to someone new and the conversation was incredible. I mean – incredible! I realize that not everyone “believes” and that’s OK … I have always believed in things like the Law of Attraction and the Universe providing that which we ask for – as well as a gut feeling or “women’s intuition”. It has served me well over the years and it provides the compass and calm when I need it most. If it’s not for you, it’s not for you. It’s like ice cream … some of us like it, some of us don’t.

Whether you believe in psychics or not I challenge you to believe in yourself. We all have the ability to know ourself and feel whether something is working for us or not. Listening to that is a whole other – other (and easier said than done) … but I do believe that we all have the ability to really know when something is right or wrong. Sometimes we need to find a quiet space to think and challenge ourselves and really listen … but it’s there when we are ready.

Whenever I am struggling with something I will look to a clairvoyant for guidance. Now he/she might tell me exactly the same thing that I feel inside or even what my friends, family or colleagues are telling me, but for some reason when I hear it from a completely independent person, I am fully committed to believing it. Tonight I was reminded that I need to listen to myself more – trust myself more — listen to my gut feeling. And in my mind, I know that, but when “life happens” and stress gets in the way, it’s hard and I needed that independent person to tell me “calm down – you’re on the right path”. You might call me crazy but it is what works for me. It’s part of how I find my inner Superwoman.

Tonight I feel like a whole new path has opened up for me, right before my eyes, and right in the middle of my crazy, stressful, upside down life …. and it wouldn’t have happened without a little guidance from the Universe. And for that, I am so grateful for the fact that I do believe and I do trust. And I love the reminder that trying different approaches to solving a problem can work beautifully.

If you’re interested in learning more, ask your friends or family if they have had a good experience with a psychic and get a recommendation. I really enjoyed speaking with Heather from Synchronicity if you’re not sure where to look.

Oh and by the way …. I did end up passing my Entrance Exam. My psychic told me that I would “just” pass .. and that was all I needed to relax and have a good summer before I received the results in the mail in September.

My passing grade … 64%. Hey, it was still a pass!

Your Biggest Fan

11 Tuesday Feb 2014

Posted by Joanne Fedeyko in Inspiration

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biggest fan, encouragement, giving, pay it forward, success, superhero, supporter

Ever have someone that thinks you’re awesome?! Usually our parents fall into this category, but I want you to think about someone who isn’t related to you. And while a best friend might qualify, I’d like you to think even beyond them.

I’m talking about someone that does more than support you or encourage you, but they go out of their way to help you find success. They offer to make introductions, or talk about your talents when you’re not in the room, and they just generally think you’re so great that they want everyone else to know the same. What is even more spectacular is when you randomly meet someone and they take to you in a way that you know that they could fall into your fan category. It makes you blush and giggle inside with childhood excitement.

I call these fabulous people “Your Biggest Fans”.

And so I would like you to think about how you can become someone’s biggest fan and here is why …

Having someone who isn’t related to you, or isn’t already connected in a deep way to you, stand on a proverbial mountain top to tell the world how great you are, is simply one of the best and most encouraging feelings that exist. It’s like having your very own superhero who helps you when you’re in need and guides you to success. And if you are someone’s biggest fan, then hopefully they will apply the Pay it Forward model, and be someone else’s biggest fan as well. And if that happens often enough, then I think we’ll have started a small movement to make the world a better, happier place.

If you have someone in your life today that is your biggest fan, I encourage you to offer a random act of kindness and thank them for being there for you. And in the same breath, think about someone that you know and think is just great and consider being their advocate in a way that would make them blush and giggle with happiness.

To all of you, who have been someone’s biggest fan, thank you!!

And to those people who have been mine, I am eternally grateful.

You Never Know

06 Thursday Feb 2014

Posted by Joanne Fedeyko in Business, Family, Inspiration

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conference, friends, giving back, startup grind, unconference, VC

It’s hard to know what the outcome will be of anything you do. You could wake up super excited for no reason at all and have the best day of your life … or it could be the worst day without rhyme or reason. On any given day we have no idea what will happen – who we will meet – what events will occur … or if we will make a meaningful impact on someone or something through the course of the day. And that should be something that we all embrace versus fear. Easier said than done, right?! … I know!

The conference that I just attended was unlike any other conference for one small but critical reason – the founder made the simple act of giving back to other attendees a core part of how everyone interacted. Instead of the “Hi I am so-and-so and I do such-and-such … what about you?” … and then the “boring, exactly-the-same-response” in return type of dialogue … the conversations went like this “Tell me your story …. how can I help you?”. And that simple question changed the landscape of the entire event.

Instead of putting your head down and walking past people, everyone looked you in the eye and said hello – and then stopped – and a meaningful conversation followed. Crazy, right?!

Now, not all connections will bring life-stopping change to the world, but I have to say that out of everyone that I met in 2.5 days, probably a solid 80% provided me with something of value. Such as ….

– I met a VC that is now trying to help connect me to the right company to find a job — thank you Dave!! You’re amazing!

– I met a fellow Canadian who is looking for some running routes around the city, to which I would be more than happy to share my favorite spots with Nathan (coming soon via LinkedIn my friend)

– I met Pete (who recognized me from my Twitter profile because I re-tweeted him the day before) who is originally from London and is now living in Whistler doing something really neat with 360 degree video … was introduced to that same VC mentioned above and who knows where that will lead! Good luck Pete! Not to mention that I now know someone who lives in Whistler! ha ha

– I got to interact with loads of young, spirited, bright-eyed 20-something year olds that have the ideas and enthusiasm to one day be ON the stage at these events in a few years — so I will be able to say “remember when we met and we laughed so hard at the whatchamacallit” — Girolama, what fun!! I look forward to your return trip in March!

… My point is that while we wake up and we go about our day with either hope or perhaps on some days, let’s admit it, a little despair … we never (ever) really know where the day will take us. We have to be open to all of the possibilities. We surely won’t see or experience change by living in our typical box — keeping our head down as we pass the new hire at the water cooler or stranger in the line at Starbucks .. so try to take the “give something back” approach and look to each person you encounter today with the concept of helping him or her along their journey. You might be pleasantly surprised with where it will lead you.

And by the way .. you can apply this to your personal life and not just work. Weaving this concept into your daily life with those that mean the most to you will have profound effects on the relationships with each person in your inner circle.

A final shout out to Mia, Elissa, Adam (Dr. Love), Thomas, Girolama and Silke — thanks for a very fun evening. See you at Startup Grind 2015!

Mediocrity Is Not An Option

05 Wednesday Feb 2014

Posted by Joanne Fedeyko in Business, Inspiration

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

conference, entrepreneurs, inspiration, mc hammer, mediocrity, method product, rap music, Silicon Valley, startup, startup grind

This week I have the privilege of attending an entrepreneur conference here in the Silicon Valley called Startup Grind. After about 14 hours of speakers, networking and sometimes a sheer overload of inspiration (hard to believe but true), I’m reminded of a phrase I heard (and have tried to live by) many years ago — mediocrity is not an option. And it surely is no destination!

I’m humbled to live in an area where there is such amazing talent, inspiration and knowledge — and I’m thrilled that I get to learn from, and meet, so many people that have a sincere passion to change the world. It might be with a healthcare product — or the arts — or it could be with an idea that they haven’t thought of yet … it actually doesn’t matter because their desire is contagious. And I love that. When I’m in the room with my notebook in hand, and Twitter update formulating in my head, I feel like I am exactly where I am supposed to be. Even though I’m not on stage enthralling the audience with my audacious product that scaled to a billion users overnight (yet – ha ha), it still feels like I’m in the exact right place in my life right now.

We should never (ever) settle for anything less than our heart desires, or that which our dreams create. Mediocrity is really not an option – not when we have the world at our fingertips and access to so much inspiration all around us.

If your passion isn’t startup entrepreneurism, that’s Ok — you have another passion and that is what you need to feed. And if you don’t know what your passion is, that is OK as well – you can find it. Do this exercise each day until you find something that moves you — wake up every morning 10 minutes before your alarm typically goes off and grab a pen and a blank piece of paper and complete the following:

“If I could do anything that I wanted to do today, be anything I wanted to be … I would _______”. And don’t put sleep in or take a long bath … while those are noble aspirations, think about what really moves your heart and what you’re naturally attracted to that may or may not be getting attention on a daily basis. Do this every day and I promise you, clarity will come.

For there is a whole life ahead of us — so read carefully when I write (as quote from Rose Tremain) — “Life is not a dress rehearsal!”

People – let’s get inspired! Let’s not accept mediocrity, or as my new Startup Grind friend, and one day future billionaire Thomas Griffin wrote, “do not accept tasteless mediocrity” which sounds way more savvy and 21st century.

MC Hammer on the Startup Grind Stage !!

Method Co-Founder Eric Ryan with the best presentation of the day!

Method Co-Founder Eric Ryan with the funniest presentation of the day!

A Teachable Moment

04 Tuesday Feb 2014

Posted by Joanne Fedeyko in Family, Inspiration

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children, education, teachable moments, teaching youth, webinars

The other day as my stepdaughter was (impatiently) waiting to leave for volleyball practice I had her help me finish addressing some envelopes for a nonprofit project. At the same time I was (attempting) to listen to an online webinar as I am taking every chance I can to learn these days. It wasn’t a fantastic webinar but I was committed nonetheless.

As Florencia was putting stamps on the letters she started to ask me questions. What were the letters in the envelopes about? How do the letters get to the person? Is it free to mail a letter? How much does it cost? Questions that were cute and made me giggle … but could have also been a little annoying at the same time because like I said, I was trying to be engaged with the webinar.

Thankfully I let the cute part overrule the potentially annoying part and I instead had the chance to educate my stepdaughter on the act of giving (the letters were tax receipts for a nonprofit I have been involved with) … and the value of things (both monetarily — as in “how much does a stamp cost” and how it costs more to send a letter outside of the country — and on the non-monetary side such as why people donate their hard earned money to charities).

I closed my laptop as we finished sealing and stamping the envelopes and soon after it was time to go to volleyball practice. Florencia probably never gave our conversation another thought but I had the biggest grin on my face for the rest of the day. I felt grateful that I took a few moments to teach instead of be taught. In the end I learned more that day from the discussion with Florencia then I ever could have learned from a webinar.

Sometimes it’s important to let go of what we’re doing and embrace the world that is right in front of us.